New program to 'launch' fall '07

ANN 04.01.07 SPECIAL EDITION: President Robert E. "Skip" Myers was delighted to announce that the long-anticipated Space and Aeronautics Program would open to students this fall.

Classes will start in September, while the equipment and facilities for active training will be in place for the spring '08 semester.

"It's not a secret that a project of this magnitude required an astronomical effort to get underway, pardon the pun. And that's exactly what we've had to put in for the past three years. (You wouldn't believe the zoning regulations we had to file!)," said Myers.

"But with a little help along the way and with the support of our community, we've been able to meet the challenge, and Daniel Webster College will be the first college in the nation, nay, the world, to offer this type of program."

The program had been kept under wraps for months, although signs that something big was happening on campus were evident.

"They had this huge hanger built out by the runway. That was the first clue," said one sophomore. "Then there were the deafening roar and winds that came from the Aviation Center every so often; I guess those were the test firings for the launching pad. But the big clue was the hanger."

The Space and Aeronautics Program also opens up new avenues for DWC's existing programs, as well.

"Obviously the Engineering division is going crazy over this. We've almost had to physically bar them from fawning over the new equipment," laughed Myers.

When the announcement came that the division would offer a new Rocket and Space Vehicle elective next fall, several students were reported to have fainted from the excitement.

The Computer Science division will also add new classes aligned with the new program: "Ballistics and Telemetry Calculation," and "How to Make An Artificial Intelligence That Won't Take Over The Station And Try to Kill Everyone."

Even DWC's Business division is getting in on the act.

"One of the largest reasons we didn't start developing the S&A (Space and Aeronautics) program earlier was that NASA astronauts are hand-picked from the military, not from college graduates," said Business division chair Reza Hoshmand.

"But with the new surge in endowed entrepreneurs funding private space-based enterprises, it's opened a whole new door for the industry. Our Business division might not be training future astronauts, but for this industry to grow, it's clear we need more wealthy entrepreneurs. We, in the division, intend to fill that need."

DWC Athletic Director John Griffith was excited about the creation of the college's new low-gravity lacrosse team.

"And just you wait till you see the zero-gravity dunking contest we're putting together for our basketball program!" he exclaimed.

Even some student clubs have gotten into the act.

Said the president of DWC's little-known Astronomy club. "For more than two years we've been watching the sky, trying to find and chart asteroids that could impact Earth and change life as we know it. We were just doing it as a hobby before, but with the new Space program, it's like all our work has been validated."

"By the way," she added, "October 12 or 13, 2017? You may want to stay inside."

The new program launches this fall despite the many setbacks and challenges that delayed its progress.

"We had one incident where one of the Cessna's in our fleet wasn't properly secured during a test launch for the Trustees," said Assistant Director of Flight Operations, Aidan Wilps.

"The blast from the launch pad hurled the plane halfway across the airfield and into the parking lot, where it slammed head-on into one board member's Hummer and then exploded. There was nothing left of the plane, [and it] took more than two days to clean up the mess. Luckily, the board member's Hummer wasn't damaged."

Noise complaints emerged from surrounding neighborhoods, but those complaints dropped significantly when property values and local business skyrocketed from all the media attention.

And, according to industry analysts, the UFO souvenir industry spiked an unbelievable 3240% increase just this past month.

Many skeptics have attacked the program for its location; not because the campus and airfield are located in the heart of Nashua, New Hampshire's residential and commercial sectors, but because of its well known severe and unpredictable New England weather.

In response to those concerns, President Myers said, "I'm not an expert on the subject - that's a job for our rocket scientists - but I'm fairly confident when I say that rockets are big. Really, really big.

"And," he added, "the thrust from those rockets are more intense than any weather we might see here. I dare anyone to say that they've seen the weather poor enough to lift one of our shuttles off the runway. Except for that one time."

What the future has in store for Daniel Webster College's new program is anyone's guess, but it's sure to bring New Hampshire more media exposure than a dozen presidential primary candidates gallivanting around the state.

Concluded Myers, "If you pardon the cliché, Nashua, the eagle has landed."

FMI: www.dwc.edu/news/2006-2007/space_program.shtml