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Sat, Apr 26, 2003

Flyin' Natural

Two SWA Pilots Canned For Flying and Flapping

Now, just a minute, here. When it first got going, Southwest Airlines lured passengers in part by asking cabin crew members to "show a little skin." Back in the 70s, female cabin crew members wore hotpants. But a pair of male pilots has now been fired for not wearing any pants at all.

Well, At Least They Weren't Hiding Any Guns

The captain and his first officer apparently took their uniforms off in the cockpit and were flying virtually naked. They were reported by a flight attendant who had been summoned to the cockpit. SWA wouldn't name the crew members - they're appealing their termination - and wasn't specific about the flight upon which the alleged nakedness occurred. The pilot and copilot say they spilled their coffee on their uniforms.

We at ANN have been trying to come up with reasons why both cockpit crewmembers would be forced to disrobe in flight. In lieu of (pardon us) full disclosure from the airline or the pilots involved, we've listed the top ten possibilities. Please, add your own.

  1. They suddenly gained weight.
  2. They suddenly lost weight.
  3. In a freak atmospheric display, their pants were hit by lightning.
  4. They realized they were wearing each others' uniforms and were attempting a switch.
  5. It was really hot that day.
  6. They were comparing scars. It just got away from them.
  7. A vent window popped open and the resulting windstorm whisked their uniforms completely from their bodies.
  8. They were playing strip poker. It was a tie.
  9. "My boxers are flashier than yours."
  10. "Okay. I believe you. It WAS a mouse in your pocket. In fact, there was a mouse in MY pocket, too."


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